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Tips from a dad….for labor and delivery!

 

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It’s Go Time! There is a baby getting born here to you two tonight/tomorrow, and your life is about to become something better/crazier/and more insanely beautiful than you have ever dared to dream.

Still, there is this whole business of standing there, arms wide open, as you stare up at the stork in the sky.

There is still this whole business of getting your Prangel (Pregnant Angel; my creation!) to the hospital and seeing her through the most epic day of your lives.

Up in Maternity, it’s a whole different ballgame. And, lucky for you, Mr. Daddy Newguy, I got all the inside scoops you’re ever gonna need to get you where you need to go.

1. Be Classy

Go to the classes your Prangel (Pregnant Angel; my creation!) wants you to go to. Sure, getting up early on a Saturday morning to go sit in a conference room at the hospital might sound uncool, but take it from me: it rules. Not only do you get off on the right fathering foot, learning equal parts science and common sense, but you also show her from the get-go that you are right and ready for this.

2. Mr. Early Bags

Overnight kit/knapsack/man-bag/whatever you want to call it: get that packed up and ready to roll pretty well in advance. Believe me when I tell you that you don’t want to be the dude trying to recall where he put his razor when she is out in the car counting the seconds between contractions. Get yourself set up two weeks before her due date, throw the bag in the trunk, and you’ve got one less thing to worry about. Incidentally, if she is running around packing last minute things for herself keep your trap shut!

3. Skip That 7-11

You’re on your way, now. You’re both in the car and you’re holding hands and there is electric magic in the air between the two of you. And then: what’s this? You’re seriously doing a quick pit stop at the mini-market to dump in three dollars of unleaded and grab some beef jerky for the ride? My friend, there are many mistakes you will be forgiven in this life. This is not one of them. Drive her to the hospital.

4. Boombox Mama

You like your music? Hooray for you. Guess what? You’re not about to blast out the end of a nine-month tunnel of swollen ankles, constant puking, and fifty tinkles an hour just to top it off with a little human delivery. Let the lady pick the tunes. On the ride and in the room, every song. Trust me, she doesn’t wanna listen to your Johnny Cash Live at Folsom Prison album just now.

5. Nurse Love

You’re a little jittery, a little on edge. It’s perfectly understandable, man. You’re about to become a dad; there’s pressure in that. But, remember that those women and men who work in the Maternity Ward are usually pretty magnificent at what they do. Try and be cool with them, and let them see you are a grateful classy Future Papa. It’s pretty rare that any of them want anything but smooth sailing for the little lady, the baby, and you.

6. The King of Flexibility

Ok, I’m not trying to convince you to get all rubbery like this guy does. (Though if I could bend like that, I’d be doing it all over the delivery room.) What I’m trying to say is don’t check into the hospital with some big vision about how things are going to be. Even if Baby Mama has a hundred-page Birth Plan, you need to be there for her when things change. And ask any guy who’s been there, things will change. Just be cool, cowboy. She’s gonna thank you for it later.

7. The Night is Long, Long, Long

There is no telling how Father Time is going play a role in the birth of your child, but you can bet that he will be a playa in the game. Hey, you and your Prangel (Pregnant Angel; my creation!) might be on your way to the hospital and Shazam! She might have the kid in the car. It happens. More likely, though, you will have some waiting around to do once you’re all checked in. So, try and be patient and help her through the long hours slogging by. That bambino is coming soon enough!

8. Ask Questions, Fool!

What is that needle you’re sticking in her spine bone? What happens when our baby first arrives? Where did you get that stylish stethoscope? Don’t be intimidated by doctors and nurses just because they seem busy. They are there to answer any and all questions either of you might have throughout your stay. I once asked our nurse if I could spread the ultra-sound jelly on my wife’s belly. And she let me. So, that’s one thing checked off the old Bucket List.

9.  The Fine Art of Hand Holding

Believe it or not, there are many opportunities for subtle yet graceful romantic moments in the hours leading up to your baby being born. And you will often find yourself in a position to hold your lady’s hand, and you should do it too. But don’t be the squeezer, man. Always let her squeeze to her heart’s content, but if you start squeezing back be prepared for a fire breathing dragon to torch your head. Also: you have no idea how strong your Baby Mama is. Your hand is in for it.

10. The Evil Eye

She loves you. Or, at the very least she’s pretty glad that you are there. But remember, someone who has been pregnant for a very long time is now going through one of the most physically challenging things this life offers up. So, if she seems, at times, a little grumpy or flustered, and you think she’s taking it out on you, well, you may be right. And you need to take it and smile and hold her hand (but not too tightly, remember?). In three years, you’ll be feeling the wrath of toddler tantrums that will make all this seem like it was a quiet afternoon in the country.

11. Here Comes the Son!

Straight up, friend. Do not look down at The Magic Portal unless she has invited you to visit. Either plan it all out ahead of time (my recommendation) or go ahead and ask if it’s ok mid-shebang. But, if you think you can just wander down there to take in the sights any old time you want without advance notice you might just have another thing coming.

12. Ham Hands

Women in labor often love a little massage, a little muscular hootchie-coo when the going gets tough. Yet, I’m going to go ahead and advise you that you’d better be sure she is in the mood before you start in with those ancient caveman noogies you give out freely. Listen to her. Ask her if she’d like a shoulder rub, and if she does, start out slooooow and easy. Don’t jump in there like you’re gutting a flounder. Nice and easy does it every time.

13. The Remote

From the minute you put the bags down and she puts on her gown and climbs into that bed, do something you hardly ever do, buddy. Hand over that remote control. Let her flip through the channels and watch what she chooses. Yeah, you’d rather eat glass than watch The Real Housewives of Green Bay, but tough it out. Laugh with her. Sit back and just enjoy it when she flies right past all thirty ESPN channels. Soon enough, you’ll both be watching Dora The Explorer marathons anyway

14. Blooming Onion Head

At some point during the wait you might wander down to the cafeteria. That’s fine. But eat it there. Do not, for the love of all that is dignified and true, show up back at her bedside, while she cannot eat any food but frozen water or unfrozen water, chowing down on a blooming onion or whatever. If you do, there will be hell to pay.

15. Pretty Little Angel Eyes

Keeping with the underlying theme of you being Mr. Suave during this excitable time, why not remind her that she is looking strangely radiant and hot. There is no reason she shouldn’t hear that from you at a time when she probably isn’t feeling nearly as pretty as she is feeling sweaty and puffy. Tell her she looks awesome, and mean it, dude.

16. Up to Eleven

Try not to get too loud during the last laps. Of course, you are going to be excited, but your voice, above all others, is probably the one that your Prangel (Pregnant Angel; my creation!) is going to be listening for the most. So do your best to keep it steady and sure.

17. Nothing But Flowers

During the course of the proceedings sometimes things happen that are both harmless and beyond anyone’s control. So listen closely as I tell you something important. Deny, then and forever, that she has “had an accident”. You saw nothing because there was nothing. Right? Right.

18. Be the Ball

The arrival of a bambino is a wild affair. There’s blood and screaming and people rushing around nudging you this way and that way. It’s easy to lose your wits sometimes, there is ample opportunity to get rattled. But try your best not to. Have a corner or a window picked out where you can walk to if you need to make a freaked-out face or whatever. That’s fine. But when you wander back over to her bedside be the guy with the tender words and the perfect hand for her to hold. She will never ever forget it if you can pull it off.

19. Do Not Tweet the Pageant

Did you see that Tori Spelling shot her husband posted by mistake on Twitter? I guarantee you your lady did. Don’t commit the irreversible sin of posting something wrong in the heat of battle. By all means,take all the pictures you want. But, tweet one out there for the world to see before the little lady approves it and you could end up as a monument to Regret.

20. Do Not Deny/Abuse the Ice Chips

Ice chips are a mainstay in the delivery room. They keep Baby Mama safely hydrated and offer up a nice little opportunity for you to get in there and offer her some refreshment with love. But watch out. My own field research shows that unsolicited ice chips, at the wrong time, can get you chewed out. Or bit.

21.  Cut. The. Cord.

This one is simple, if you ask me. It doesn’t matter if you’re squeamish. It doesn’t matter if you faint at the sight of blood. It doesn’t matter whatever lame excuse you might come up with. If you don’t cut that brand new little girl or boy’s cord, she is never ever going to look at you the same again. And she’s right, too.

22. Get the Big Shot

In all the excitement, all the sweet chaos that follows the arrival of your wee one, don’t forget to take the most important picture you will ever take, man. That moment that baby is laid in your wife’s tired arms. Be ready! You’ll always be glad you were. And if by chance you missed it, just go straight back to the dog house when you get home because that’s where you live now.

23. Dummy Check

Not long after the baby is born they are going to come along and herd you and the family to another room. Your lady will be exhausted, probably even asleep, and so it is pretty important you do a good sweeping visual search of the delivery room. Cameras, wallets, cellphones, her novel. Round them all up and you’re good to go. Lose the camera: you’re a dead man.

24. Remember: Part 1

It’s been a helluva ride, and she’s done an incredible thing today. The best thing ever, really. So, remember to simply give her a little squeeze at the end of the day and tell her she was the badass of your dreams.

25.  Remember: Part 2

And last but not least, fellows. Remember to look around you every hour or two while you’re in there, helping bring your little one into this world. Remember to soak as much of the day in as you can: from the ice chips to that kid in your arms: remember that it was all so worth it. And worth remembering.

                                  ~Serge Bielanko, New Dad.

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The amazing fourth trimester…

 

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Dr. Harvey Karp urges parents to adopt the role of “a walking uterus” for the first three months after baby is born, what he calls the “fourth trimester.”

Join us Tuesday June 2nd to learn more about this fascinating concept.

Karp says babies have a “calming reflex” that can be triggered by the “Five S’s” – swaddling, positioning him on his stomach or side, shushing loudly in his ear or playing white noise, swinging him to mimic the jiggling motion of the womb, and letting him suck on a pacifier or breast.

“The reason this is important is, crying is a terrible nuisance. It’s one of the banes of a new parents’ existence,” Karp told Newsday in an interview. “Crying is not just a nuisance, but it’s a primary trigger for postpartum depression, for marital stress, for breast-feeding failure, for child abuse. for maternal smoking, for SIDS, for the overtreatment of children with acid reflux medicine, for mothers overeating and mothers getting into car accidents.”

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This is very important information to learn and digest BEFORE your baby is born…

The key concept for taking care of a new baby is the idea of the fourth trimester. The idea that, in this weird sort of way, babies are born three or four months before they’re really ready to bloom. It’s the critical theory when you understand that living in the womb is a symphony of sensations – jiggling motion, constant sound … and constant touch – then you understand how bizarre it is to take a new baby and stick them in a room by themselves on a flat bed in a totally quiet space.

If you understand that ahead of time, then you’re primed for your job when the baby is born, which is to be one big, walking uterus…

Tuesday June 2nd

5:30

Indian River Medical Center

 

Join us! You will be GLAD you did!

Dad’s and family encouraged!!

Did you know…..

carseatsafety

Yes….It is a fact! Let’s face it…you have been doing a beautiful job safely growing and nourishing your unborn little bundle.

You have spent time learning about healthy eating and behaviors

spent hours, maybe days, devising a birth plan to help your gorgeous babe join you earthside.

YOU ARE A GREAT MOM…ALREADY!

 

It only makes sense to continue the quest to keep them as safe and healthy as possible.

Road injuries are the leading cause of preventable deaths and injuries to children in the United States.

Seventy-three percent of car seats are not used or installed correctly, so before you bring your beautiful, long awaited baby home…. check your car seat. –

Join us on Tuesday May 12th

5:30 at IRMC

with a safe kids certified car seat technician.

This is the place to bring your questions….even bring your car seat if you don’t feel knowledgeable of the do’s and don’ts of car seat safety.

 

It IS that important.

Look forward to seeing YOU!

 

Wishing you the most joyous,

healthy,

 Beautiful Belly of a

MOTHER’S DAY

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The fragile and fun fourth trimester…..

You may have heard of the fourth trimester.

Basically, it’s the idea that the first 3 months of life are very much an extension of life in the womb for baby. Baby has spent 40 weeks (or there abouts!) having her every need attended to.

  • She never knew hunger, was always rocked, and could always hear mama’s heartbeat.

Given that, it seems pretty unrealistic to expect a newborn baby to adjust to life on the outside instantly.

That’s why attempts at scheduling a newborn or unrealistic expectations about sleep frustrate parents more often than not.
Babies are born used to the daily rhythm of mama’s movements.

So it makes sense that they would protest at attempts to transition them suddenly to a stationary object like a crib or bassinet.

The popularity of baby swings and bouncers attests to the universal need babies have for motion.

Swings and bouncers certainly have their place but nothing substitutes for mama’s (or daddy’s) arms.

As much as new parents would love to just sit and hold their newborns, that’s certainly not realistic …particularly if you have other toddlers and children to tend to
Come and Join us Tuesday May 5th

to learn some vital tips and skills

to mimic that third trimester

and keep your baby happy and soothed through

the oh so important 4th trimester!

5:30 at Indian River Medical Center

Partners, family even friends encouraged!

Why work and pump?

Why Work and Pump??

By continuing to breastfeed after you return to work, you will:

  • Provide the best nutrition for your baby
  • Make it possible to keep breastfeeding when you are together
  • Keep a special closeness to your baby even when you must be apart
  • Save money
  • Avoid the health risks associated with formula feeding
  • Miss less work, because breastfed babies are sick less

 

boob

We will explore how to combine work and school and continuing to breastfeed. Sure, there are challenges….But it is so doable!

                     Join us Tuesday April 28th

5:30

For tips and tricks to combine work/school and breastfeeding

We will have a pump to demonstrate with…

Breastmilk…..It is what’s for dinner.

BFCUES

…Used to be that we thought babies were hungry when they cried. Now we know when a baby has been crying, it has been asking for food for a LONG time…

 

Come Join us this month for two Breastfeeding classes….The first on

Tuesday April 7th at 5:30

to learn babies cues

Learn all of those important fundamentals to getting baby off to a great start.

Join us at the end of the month

Tuesday April 28th at 5:30

for a class on Breastfeeding and returning to work or school

learn some pumping skills and tips.

 

Both classes are held at Indian River Medical Center

Join Us!!

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Healthy Pregnancy snacks…

Taking care of yourself is one of the best gifts you can give that baby in your beautiful belly.

But it’s hard to eat right when facing a snack attack — they hit at odd times (or all the time) and, if you’re not careful, can lead to packing on some serious poundage.

And even when you do plan ahead, the same old, same old snacks get to be…well…old.

To the rescue: new spins on healthy pregnancy snacks that are nutrient-dense to leave you satisfied, energized, and nausea-free without overloading you on fat or calories.

Plus, these two easy-to-make tidbits deliver the good stuff your baby-to-be needs to grow.

 

Smoothies….

Fruit_Smoothie-3

Easy to prepare if you have a blender.  Yogurt’s crammed with calcium (it has more than milk), which helps a baby’s developing bones, teeth, and muscles.

Try this recipe:

I cup of yogurt (unsweetened or any flavor)

1 cup of frozen fruit (try peaches or mango for a change)

1/2 c of orange juice

a bit of honey….you don’t NEED to use it.

Whirl in blender and enjoy!    Try throwing in a handful of spinach or kale…make it green!

 

Carrot, walnut and raisin salad…

carrot-slaw-cranberries-walnuts

Try this….

In a large bowl, whisk together a quarter cup of low-fat mayonnaise, two tablespoons of honey, and a quarter cup low-fat milk. Stir in four cups shredded carrots, three-quarter cup of raisins, and a third of a cup of chopped walnuts, and toss to combine.

Why it’s a healthy pregnancy snack:Carrots are rich in vitamins C and A, which help develop your baby’s bones, teeth, and eyes. They’re also a great source of vitamin B6, which can boost your baby’s growing brain and nervous system.

For you, they’ll help ease queasiness; and the raisins are fiber- and iron-filled, so they’re helpful with digestion and building blood cells. As for the walnuts, they contain omega-3 fatty acids, which will aid your baby’s brain and eye development while reducing your risk of postpartum depression.